So much of our well being is in our head. I went to the Gym today. I worked out with my therapist/trainers. These are wonderful, intuitive professional people. They know that i react differently with a ball in my hands. Part of the session is tailored to that. I can walk in dragging my feet, but let me throw a ball and I'm taken back to a place that I loved. It then makes the subsequent exercises that much easier.
Today, on the drive there, I was a Parkinson's patient. When I left, I felt differently. My walking was better, my driving was better. Some of this is the adrenaline, but a firmly believe that some of this is an attitude change that I get from throwing a ball.
Michael J. Fox plays hockey. Muhammed Ali works on the speed bag. Their Parkinsons has progressed far more than mine. What they have in common is attitude. They are both very positive people.
So all I have to say is, "Put me in Coach. I'm ready to play today."
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
November 29, 2010. I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now!
There is a different perspective on life, being more a Pedestrian, and less a driver.
Forest Hills has a high population of elderly. All things considered, I still walk faster than most people. I have difficulty making it across Queens Boulevard in one light cycle. How do the elderly do it? The cars don't wait. They're honking their horn the second that the light changes. Driver's Education must now teach that that red and white octagonal sign doesn't mean stop, it means "roll through and curse at the Pedestrian."
Today, as I was entering the Subway at Continental and Queens, there was an elderly man climbing the steps the other way. People behind him were delayed. One young lady was flailing her arms, in obvious frustration. Five years ago I could have acted like that girl. Five years from now I could be that Gentleman.
How long did that flight of steps actually delay this girl? 10 seconds? How long does it take to actually stop at the stop sign?
There are benefits to having more difficulty in day to day life. You begin to appreciate what others go through. Making it only natural to make their lives less difficult.
Forest Hills has a high population of elderly. All things considered, I still walk faster than most people. I have difficulty making it across Queens Boulevard in one light cycle. How do the elderly do it? The cars don't wait. They're honking their horn the second that the light changes. Driver's Education must now teach that that red and white octagonal sign doesn't mean stop, it means "roll through and curse at the Pedestrian."
Today, as I was entering the Subway at Continental and Queens, there was an elderly man climbing the steps the other way. People behind him were delayed. One young lady was flailing her arms, in obvious frustration. Five years ago I could have acted like that girl. Five years from now I could be that Gentleman.
How long did that flight of steps actually delay this girl? 10 seconds? How long does it take to actually stop at the stop sign?
There are benefits to having more difficulty in day to day life. You begin to appreciate what others go through. Making it only natural to make their lives less difficult.
November 29, 2010. In My Father's Eyes
I was first diagnosed with PD when I was 49. At the time, my wife and I decided to keep it quiet. My father was ill, and we felt that it would have been too much for my folks to handle at that time.
My folks had always been an integral part of my life. Not sharing this with them was difficult, but was part of the continuing process of growing up. i spent most of my Sunday mornings the next two years visiting my Dad. At first I would drive into Manhattan. Later, when I became uncomfortable driving in the City, I would take the bus. By that time I had told my folks.
With my father ill, and my future unsure, I was depressed. I didn't concentrate on my business. The coinciding with the worst economy in 70 years spelled near disaster.
My wife, far wiser than I, saw the future. She realized that my days of a 50 mile round trip commute were over, so she exercised insider rights given to us to purchase another unit in our building, and convinced me that we should purchase a studio apartment. My office is now on the 17th floor, my apartment on the 10th. An easy commute.
My friends on the Island also allowed me to use their offices. These offices are near the Long Island Railroad so it's also an easy commute.
I have and have always had bad work habits. I'll work for 20 minutes, walk around the office and "kibitz" for 10 minutes and back to work. The problem arose, who do I "kibitz" with on the 17th floor? The answer arose, The internet. I started to reconnect with old friends. One day around that time I woke up. The depression was just a waste of time.
I continued to spend my Sunday Mornings with my Dad. My dad was a special man. The most educated, informally educated man that I've ever met. He could have been, and in his own way was, a brilliant engineer.
Although Dad sold sporting goods, he never was a sports fan, but his two sons were. So dad would take us to the Garden to see the Rangers. 17,000 people would be screaming. Dad would be snoring. He wake up and say, "That was a great play." my brother would say, "Dad, that's the Zamboni." The story is not completely true. However as they said in, "The Man who shot Liberty Valance," "When the legend becomes fact, print the legend."
I miss my Dad. I wouldn't have given up those last two years of visits for anything.
My folks had always been an integral part of my life. Not sharing this with them was difficult, but was part of the continuing process of growing up. i spent most of my Sunday mornings the next two years visiting my Dad. At first I would drive into Manhattan. Later, when I became uncomfortable driving in the City, I would take the bus. By that time I had told my folks.
With my father ill, and my future unsure, I was depressed. I didn't concentrate on my business. The coinciding with the worst economy in 70 years spelled near disaster.
My wife, far wiser than I, saw the future. She realized that my days of a 50 mile round trip commute were over, so she exercised insider rights given to us to purchase another unit in our building, and convinced me that we should purchase a studio apartment. My office is now on the 17th floor, my apartment on the 10th. An easy commute.
My friends on the Island also allowed me to use their offices. These offices are near the Long Island Railroad so it's also an easy commute.
I have and have always had bad work habits. I'll work for 20 minutes, walk around the office and "kibitz" for 10 minutes and back to work. The problem arose, who do I "kibitz" with on the 17th floor? The answer arose, The internet. I started to reconnect with old friends. One day around that time I woke up. The depression was just a waste of time.
I continued to spend my Sunday Mornings with my Dad. My dad was a special man. The most educated, informally educated man that I've ever met. He could have been, and in his own way was, a brilliant engineer.
Although Dad sold sporting goods, he never was a sports fan, but his two sons were. So dad would take us to the Garden to see the Rangers. 17,000 people would be screaming. Dad would be snoring. He wake up and say, "That was a great play." my brother would say, "Dad, that's the Zamboni." The story is not completely true. However as they said in, "The Man who shot Liberty Valance," "When the legend becomes fact, print the legend."
I miss my Dad. I wouldn't have given up those last two years of visits for anything.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
November 28, 2010. Go Ask Alice.
One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all
(White Rabbit, by Grace Slick, 1967)
I'm not somebody who likes taking drugs. I've been drunk once in my life. That was 1981, Simon and Garfunkel in Central Park. I smoked pot, maybe 5 times. Decided that I was acting ridiculous, and never did it again. I have never held a conventional cigarette in my hands, let alone my mouth. My drug of choice was always chocolate.
So now as I line up my prescriptions in the morning, the thought goes through my mind, do I really need these?
The first prescription that I had was for Mirapex. This was to control the very slight tremor that I had in my hand and the more prominent tremor in my legs. Mirapex has been known to have many side effects. The most serious is obsessive behavior. People have claimed to develop serious gambling habits on Mirapex. I have notice some obsessions. I nosh (snack for all of you unfamiliar with everyday Yiddish), far too much.
Mirapex also causes some people to act out their dreams. It's dangerous for me, since I dream predominantly about sports. As I've already stated, I've slid into bases, taken jump shots and shot a hockey puck in my sleep.
Mirapex also makes one sleepy, so I've avoided raising the dosage. About 3 years ago, I started taking an Israeli drug called Azilect. I was told that it had incredible results with no known side effects. The results were very good and until I researched this I was unaware of any side effects. My right eye tears quite a bit and I get neck pains. I just learned that these can be caused by the Azilect.
In addition to those medications, I now take what is considered to be "the gold standard," for Parkinson's patients Sinemet. It has done wonders. Except for increase sleepiness, I've notice no side effects. However, the side effects don't necessarily occur quickly. Increased dosages of this drug, which becomes needed, because it wears off earlier as time goes on, can cause Dyskenesia, or involuntary movements. These movements are what Rush Limbaugh, ignorantly, mocked, when describing Michael J. Fox.
So for somebody who hates medications, although I don't feel like I'm addicted, I am dependent. It's been nearly 5 years since I've gone a day without medication. The question occurs to me, "Do I even know what the side effects are, or do I need somebody who has known and seen me prior to taking these drugs, to tell me if they've affected my behavior?"
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all
(White Rabbit, by Grace Slick, 1967)
I'm not somebody who likes taking drugs. I've been drunk once in my life. That was 1981, Simon and Garfunkel in Central Park. I smoked pot, maybe 5 times. Decided that I was acting ridiculous, and never did it again. I have never held a conventional cigarette in my hands, let alone my mouth. My drug of choice was always chocolate.
So now as I line up my prescriptions in the morning, the thought goes through my mind, do I really need these?
The first prescription that I had was for Mirapex. This was to control the very slight tremor that I had in my hand and the more prominent tremor in my legs. Mirapex has been known to have many side effects. The most serious is obsessive behavior. People have claimed to develop serious gambling habits on Mirapex. I have notice some obsessions. I nosh (snack for all of you unfamiliar with everyday Yiddish), far too much.
Mirapex also causes some people to act out their dreams. It's dangerous for me, since I dream predominantly about sports. As I've already stated, I've slid into bases, taken jump shots and shot a hockey puck in my sleep.
Mirapex also makes one sleepy, so I've avoided raising the dosage. About 3 years ago, I started taking an Israeli drug called Azilect. I was told that it had incredible results with no known side effects. The results were very good and until I researched this I was unaware of any side effects. My right eye tears quite a bit and I get neck pains. I just learned that these can be caused by the Azilect.
In addition to those medications, I now take what is considered to be "the gold standard," for Parkinson's patients Sinemet. It has done wonders. Except for increase sleepiness, I've notice no side effects. However, the side effects don't necessarily occur quickly. Increased dosages of this drug, which becomes needed, because it wears off earlier as time goes on, can cause Dyskenesia, or involuntary movements. These movements are what Rush Limbaugh, ignorantly, mocked, when describing Michael J. Fox.
So for somebody who hates medications, although I don't feel like I'm addicted, I am dependent. It's been nearly 5 years since I've gone a day without medication. The question occurs to me, "Do I even know what the side effects are, or do I need somebody who has known and seen me prior to taking these drugs, to tell me if they've affected my behavior?"
Saturday, November 27, 2010
November 27, 2010, Love and Other Drugs
I went to see a movie today. It's the first movie that I've seen in the theater in about two years. A few years ago I would have had no interest in this movie. It's the first movie that a major character has Parkinsons.
The movie centers around a Drug Salesman (Jake Gyllenhaal) who falls for a young woman (Anne Hathaway) who is going through, what is described as "Stage 1" Parkinsons. I've never heard the disease referred to in stages before, but it makes sense. The sub plot about the Viagra sales, except for the gratuitous sex (which I am in favor of), was relatively entertaining. However, had that been the gist of the movie, I would have already forgotten about it.
The important part, and the reason that I went was Maggie (Hathaway), a 26 woman inflicted with PD. She obviously did some research into the part, because she played the part without being "over the top."
As someone inflicted with this disease I found three poignant scenes:
1) When she describes to a new doctor all of the tests that she had gone through before they settle upon the diagnosis. I was tested for Carpal Tunnel, Brain Tumor even bone chips in my elbow, before the correct diagnosis;
2) Her frustration with the inability to open a packet of pop tarts;
3) A group meeting of PD patients, where the very convincing character speak with humor, about their struggles with daily activities.
For me there were a few very painful moments in the movie. This was mainly because I found her character very realistic.
I went to the movie alone. Didn't even tell my wife what I was seeing. I suppose that the reason for this was I didn't know how it would affect me. It's not for all who suffer, but I'm glad that I saw it.
The movie centers around a Drug Salesman (Jake Gyllenhaal) who falls for a young woman (Anne Hathaway) who is going through, what is described as "Stage 1" Parkinsons. I've never heard the disease referred to in stages before, but it makes sense. The sub plot about the Viagra sales, except for the gratuitous sex (which I am in favor of), was relatively entertaining. However, had that been the gist of the movie, I would have already forgotten about it.
The important part, and the reason that I went was Maggie (Hathaway), a 26 woman inflicted with PD. She obviously did some research into the part, because she played the part without being "over the top."
As someone inflicted with this disease I found three poignant scenes:
1) When she describes to a new doctor all of the tests that she had gone through before they settle upon the diagnosis. I was tested for Carpal Tunnel, Brain Tumor even bone chips in my elbow, before the correct diagnosis;
2) Her frustration with the inability to open a packet of pop tarts;
3) A group meeting of PD patients, where the very convincing character speak with humor, about their struggles with daily activities.
For me there were a few very painful moments in the movie. This was mainly because I found her character very realistic.
I went to the movie alone. Didn't even tell my wife what I was seeing. I suppose that the reason for this was I didn't know how it would affect me. It's not for all who suffer, but I'm glad that I saw it.
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